Mmmmm.... this basically consists of a lot of alphabets, which I've painstakingly arranged in particular patterns to make sense, called words. And, hardworking that I am, I've taken those words and placed them in different horizontal orientations to make nonsense, called P's Mentalpiece.
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I'm Prathap. I'm 20 now. And if you have time left over after running around trying to make the world a better place, feel free to make my life miserable by sending me more mail
My bloggie pals (You've seen these names elsewhere too? In the members list of the Bandra Gangsta-raper association? Mummy!!!)
Aditi
Anand
Anya
Khushee
Krishna
Sonal
Swami
Jay Menon
Richa
Nids
"A nice bunch of names for my next novel."
-Stephen King
"Ooooh... scary!"
-The New York Times
"The list sure is spooky, but they should have included an 8" by 6" image of this blog's owner for spine-chilling effect"
-Vogue
Ahem.... enough of the reviews.
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P's Mentalpiece
The life and times of... er...d-uh...ah! someone bound to be very, very famous...
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Sunday, October 22, 2006
The last three days, I've bin goin to see don... not that i liked it so much, but coz all i've bin seeing is the 'house full' board.
don ko pakadna mushkil nahi hain... naamumkin hain.
-P.
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Friday, October 20, 2006
the following has been taken from a seemingly harmless telephone conversation
lipin- aliya koladichu....ninakke joli kittiyenne kettoo
naan(kevin)-Enthu cheyyan...joli kitti poyeee
lipin-nee puliyaanu kettooo
naan-nee pulikutty :)
lipin-aattee...satyathil ninakkee joli kittiyooo????
naan-naan enthinaa kallam parayaneee....sathyathil enikku joli kitttiii
lipin-oh kool man.....So enthayalum treat venam
naan-Oraplalleee.....treat unduuu
lipin-thallleee.....sammathichu......ninakke sathyathil ethu companyil aano joli?
naan-satyam
lipin-enthu satyam...ninakke joli sathaymayum kittiyennu naan vishvasichu....ethu company?
naan-satyathil enikku joli kitti
lipin-Eda athu naan sammathichu...i believe u man....ethu comapny?????
naan-sathyathil enikku joli kitti
lipin-sheda ethu enthu pulivaalu.......Aatttee satyathil ninakke joli kittiyoo????
naan-sathyathil enikku joli kitti
lipin-enna para ethu company?????
naan-sathyathil enikku joli kitti
lipin-Eda @#$$%^^ ninnodonnum parajittum karyam ella...ninakke swantham companyyude peru polum ariyillaaa.....haa enthayalum treat marakkarutheeee.....Byeeee
naan-byeeee
the sad fact, which speaks volumes for the intelligence of today's architects, is that this conversation is cent percent true.
-P.
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Friday, July 23, 2004
Just a quick one (not that any of my recent posts would remind one of Leo Tolstoy's "War and Peace" in terms of length, but this a time honoured cliche to use when you don't have too much to say on a topic...) And I write this especially for all the 8-14 year olds who trot into dentist's clinics all over the world hearing momma say you'll end up with the perfect smile, one that would have a Cameron Diaz / Brad Pitt begging at your doorstep (depending on whether the 8-14 year old in question is a boy or a girl, and also on their choice of lifestyle...pah!!! what am i saying?? 8-14 year olds, dammit!)... And then Momma plays her trump card, which goes,"...and you can have all the ice-cream you want after that!!!" Not true!! Ice-cream, I agree, is one of the seven wonders of the world, but it's definitely not worth having some fellow pluck out your teeth as if they were ripe mangoes in springtime. And the worst part is, once the fellow has completed his excavation of the oral cavity, ice-cream is the last thing you'll want to ask your Tooth Fairy. A nice, sturdy baseball bat to push down the Dentist's throat would seem more like it.
I couldn't think of anything to write about, that's all.
-P.
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Monday, July 12, 2004
"A prayer for the wild at heart, kept in cages..."
-P.
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"I drink. Therefore, I am." - Descartes. Wise man.
-P.
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Wednesday, July 07, 2004
WARNING: Blogging is just too addictive! I just couldn't help it... i just had to be back. Now that I am, I dunno what to write about, but i feel so relieved, just having my ol' blog back... I'll probably write down something later, unfortunately right now I get the impression i've misplaced my brain, i just can't seem to find it. But I have to write, i mean, they made such a lot of fuss over trivial stuff like Tutankhamen's tomb, just imagine how ga-ga people would go if they came across a blog full of my priceless thoughts...
-P.
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Tuesday, July 06, 2004
wow.... this still exists!
-P.
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Tuesday, December 24, 2002
Every attempt I’ve made to launch this blog afresh has hit the dirt (to be absolutely precise, that’s how launching stuff is supposed to be – you hit the dirt, the dirt hits you back, and before you can say, “Okay wise guy, that hurt!”, you’ll be in orbit – at least, that’s what Newton says). Whenever I feel I’d like to write something, there’s no computer around, and whenever there is a computer, I either am in no mood to write, or I have a lot of people to mail. Studying medicine isn’t brain-wracking, but it sure is time taking, so I usually end up with a mailbox which says “Welcome back, Prathap! You have 74 unread mails (minus junk). Why do you even bother dropping in?”… And it’s frustrating for me not being able to enter anything in my blog, and it’s frustrating for those of you who take the pains to travel all the way into my blog, and find it exactly how you left it last summer. I’m sad I have to bid farewell to my barely 4 month old li’l fellow, I still had a lot to tell him, but that’s life. I’m not saying goodbye to any of you, coz I’ll pop my nosey head into your blogs from time to time and leave my priceless advice (ABSOLUTELY FREE!!! Future bloggers, please contact me for details on fee structure). And anyways, you’ll hear about me, coz I’ll be…er…d-uh…ah! very, very famous.
-P.
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Saturday, December 14, 2002
October 14?????? Damn, I must have overslept! *&^%$$$$@$&* the alarm!!!!
-P.
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Monday, October 14, 2002
I keep seeing you - a haze of gold,
In warm memories of days gone cold.
Miss you.
-P.
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Friday, October 04, 2002
Every morning I walk out convinced I'm looking my best. Not that I find girls stopping in a crowded street to take a good long look at me. In fact, if I remember right, the last time that happened was about 17 years ago, when I had a face that could make any sumptous female go weak in the knees. But, not being the one to get disheartened easily, I still launch fresh operations on my hair, clothes et cetera every morning in an attempt to make myself look groovy. And today, I almost did it. I mean, the moment I stepped into college, I found the girls stealing glances at me, more specifically, at my pelvic girdle, to put it mildly. In fact, some were even passing naughty smiles, and I retorted with the confident grin I keep up my sleeve for such occasions when I'm feeling sky high. Indeed, I was elated over my hike in sex appeal, which had rocketed above all sane limits. Thats when George leans over and whispers into my ear "Psssst.... fly open...". Damn.
-P.
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Tuesday, October 01, 2002
Some bloke once said “Reading maketh the man”. Now, I am not certain who the fellow was, but the reader will find it self evident that he didn’t have the faintest idea about human anatomy. Next, the reader, though he / she is no Andreas Vesalius, may proceed to explain that it is actually “Bones, muscles, blood and the lot that maketh the man”, and I whole heartedly congratulate him / her for clarifying the matter, for it is no mean achievement describing human anatomy in 10 words. Shakespeare had once described the future of a human in 10 words – “To be or not to be, that is the question”. Hence, the reader, though he / she is no William Shakespeare, does deserve a pat on the back from me (especially if the reader is a ‘she’ rather than a ‘he’, as far as me patting the back is concerned). But, what the reader would have overlooked is the fact that, whilst blundering “Reading maketh the man”, the orator had actually meant mental make-up, rather than it’s physical counterpart. I am certain that the reader will jump up from his seat, and planting a foot heavily down, shout “I knew it! I knew it!” Now come, let’s face it, you obviously didn’t. And because you didn’t, I take it upon myself to explain what the man meant. Yes, it is reading that enlivens the soul, so to speak. Books after books can keep us up and kicking, and in this category of books falls the one named a Dictionary.
Indeed, the Dictionary is a useful book. Apart from it’s many uses as a self-defence weapon and a bicep-builder weight, a marginal fraction of the populace also use it to expand their vocabulary. Now, to suit this purpose well, a Dictionary has to be updated. Hence, the authors who painstakingly compile this mammoth book put their heads together time and again to come up with the most precise elucidations of words. Believe me, this is no easy task. And, helpful that I am, I felt I should lighten their burden a bit. Lately, a lot of controversy has sprung up regarding the word “irregular”. Hence, I decided to end all confusion once and for all, and, after a fortnight of hard work, I can claim that in the next Dictionary you come across, you’ll find the word “irregular” defined as –
Irregular – P’s Mentalpiece.
There! My li’l contribution to the great English language. It may be small, but its mine, and I’m proud of it. I can sense the eyes of my reader welling up, and taking in a deep breath, I can hear him / her sniff “Bravo! Bravo!”. Indeed, in my mind’s eye, I can also see myself wiping a tear off his / her cheek (especially if the reader is a ‘her’ rather than a ‘him’, as far as me wiping a tear off the cheek is concerned).
In fact, I expect to stick to my word, and be irregular for quite some time now. You see, college has ultimately begun (4 months after school came to an end). It’s a new place, a new world. And I have no comp where I’m staying now. Moreover, college work is on the hectic side, and I’m still not out of my lethargic mood. So I don’t know when I may post next, but you can take my word on it – irregular. I’m gonna be irregular.
-P.
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Monday, September 16, 2002
The Cootchie-Cootchie-Coo Episode (a.k.a Romeo, Juliet and Dr. Omkar Sachidananda Sharma)
Take 1.
Scene: Khushee's blog. Khushee is standing near her chatterbox, with her car nearby. She is gracefully moving her fingers over the windshield, with a loving look in her eyes, and a rosy blush on her cheeks. Prathap drives up in his car, and checks out Khushee from head to toe, then back to head from toe. He repeats the exercise once more, and fiddles with his sunglasses Rajni-style.
Background music: You look wonderful tonight…
Prathap *naughty smile*: Aaja meri gaadi me bait ja…
Khushee *lol*: Aaja meri gaadi me bait ja…
(A pleasant sigh escapes from the Director. All is well.)
Prathap: Maybe we should decide on who’s gaadi who is gonna bait…
Dr. Omkar Sachidananda Sharma. M. A, Ph. D (Hindi, Sanskrit): SH-TOP!!! IT’S NOT BAIT!!!
Director: What…Where…How…from? [Yes, he has a way with words.]
Prathap and Khushee: Where did this fellow pop out from??? [Not as aesthetically perfect as the Director’s question, but it suits the purpose quite well]
Dr. Omkar Sachidananda Sharma. M. A, Ph. D (Hindi, Sanskrit): IT’S BAITH, NOT BAIT!!!
Director, Prathap and Khushee: @#$%^$$%*(&@
Take 2………….@#$^%%&*@
Take 3………….$%#%$$)*^%$%#
Take 4………….&%$^$#%^$&$#^@
………..
………..
………..
Take 24.
Scene: Khushee’s blog. Khushee is leaning on her car, parked near her chatterbox. All the love has disappeared from her eyes, and the blush on her cheeks has left to catch some fresh air. Prathap drives up in his car, checking out Khushee from head to waist in the process. He doesn’t wait to repeat the deed. Btw, he has forgotten the sunglasses.
Background music: Who let the dogs out?
Prathap *no smile, no nothing*: Aake appun ke gaadi me bait, what?
Not-So-Khushee *groans*: Wokay.
Dr. Omkar Sachidananda Sharma. M. A, Ph. D (Hindi, Sanskrit): ABBE, BINA COCKPIT KE AIRLINE, IT’S BAITH. BAITH. “H”. NOT BAIT. SH-TUPID PHELLOW!!! DOESN’T KNOW PROPER PER-NOUN-CIATION!!!
Director (with a sigh which seems to say “Yup. I give up. Yup. Yup. Yup.”): Cut. Cut! CUT!!!
Me, Myself and Khushee: %^$@#@#$%&**^$!!!
Take 25……..*&%%##@#&^
Take 26……..(%$%W%^&&^%*
Take 27……..(*%%^@#%#$##@$%^
………….
………….
Take 47.
Scene: Khushee’s blog. Near her chatterbox. Khushee is slumped over her car. Prathap drives up, disastrously close to ending Khushee’s existence. Car smashes into Mystique, waking him up. Looks at Khushee squarely in the face.
Background music : Jaago zara, Jaago zara…
Prathap *growls*: Aa bait!
Dukhee *snarls*: Shut up!
Director: AAAAARRGHHH!!! (A scream which was brought about when Omkarji bit into his hand, which was clasped over Omkarji's big mouth)
Dr. Omkar Sachidananda Sharma. M. A, Ph. D (Hindi, Sanskrit): (Spits out half a finger, and roars) BAIT, BAIT, BAIT!!! BAND KARO YEH ATYACHAAR!!! (Huffs and Puffs and marches off for a haircut)
Uff, Sukanya, teri toh…
-P.
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Saturday, September 14, 2002
WANTED
Prathap desperately wants new ideas for handsome postings on his blog. Any interesting stuff may apply. Like they say, age no bar. Religion no bar. Caste no bar. Sex baar-baar.
-P.
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Sunday, September 08, 2002
She is Pooja Batra - na solah hai na satrah, woh hai ek MTV Bakra. Love the show!
-P.
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In his last 3 innings, Dravid's scores were 113, 148 and 217. Like Jebin says, it won't be long before an Englishman comes up with a movie "Drive it Like Dravid"...
-P.
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Friday, September 06, 2002
If I say “Humans breathe in Oxygen”, my esteemed readers are sure to put in a round of applause and chant “We agree! We agree!”, holding out a copy of Davidson’s textbook of Medicine, Volume 2, Page 232, where it has been beautifully described how Oxygen, on effecting an entrance into our bodies, forms a working alliance with the blood to cause a few vital changes in our systems. Now, if I were to say “Humans breathe out Carbon-di-oxide”, I can imagine my esteemed lot jumping up and down with excitement, shouting at the top of their voices “We agree! We agree!”, clutching a copy of Davidson’s textbook of Medicine, Volume 2, Page 233, wherein the bloke goes on to describe how the villain, Carbon-di-oxide, is held on the scruff of the neck and kicked out through the nasal cavity of us unsuspecting humans. Next, if I were to proceed and say “Humans do funny stuff in their sleep”, I can sense my esteemed bunch suddenly turning stiff, and, turning their heads to the right, then to the left, then abruptly to the right, then to the left again, they begin vehemently screaming “It can’t be! It can’t be! It doesn’t say so in any book!”. And the sad fact remains. Search high and low, but I guarantee you will not find a book answering to the name of “Collin’s textbook on Funny Sleep”, or a “Jacobson’s Guide on a Hilarious Doze”, or any parallel efforts of a William, or a Blackburn, or an Ivanov on the matter of the pranks during a snooze. But today, reality bit me, and I can say from experience that people do inexplicable things when not awake. And so I make this entry in my blog, because, quite frankly, someone has to.
Now, I have heard of people talking in their sleep. Indeed, our fellow-blogger Sonal claims to be a Master of the Art. Reliable witnesses claim that some of the speeches rendered by Sonal in her sleep have made even those of Lincoln’s pale in comparison. Others are known to walk in their sleep – one of the characters in Bram Stoker’s Dracula was particularly adept at this discipline. But imagine my surprise when I awoke from a particularly relaxing nap this afternoon to find my lips bleeding (just a little spot, but it was blood alright)! I seem to have taken a keen interest in biting the hell out of my lips during my sleep, God save me! I am pretty sure this is a fad to which I own all copyrights, and centuries hence, I can hear grandmums telling their grandchildren about the story of Prathap, the lip-biter. Yup, I’ll be famous. Like one of my ol’ pals said, “I took the road less travelled by, and that has made all the difference."
-P.
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Sunday, September 01, 2002
Some movies leave me without a clue. No, wait, I should rephrase that – some movies leave me with just a clue. The kind which aren’t just telling a story, the ones which are actually also selling ideas. Like Fight Club, or American Beauty. I see them the first time, and I see the story, but I realize the movie is not about only the story. And I have to see them again, and again, and every next time, and each time, I have to be thinking, and I come up with my own interpretation of what they may mean. I keep re-seeing some scenes, because I feel they’re talking about something worth remembering. Like Ricky Fits, like Tyler. And this feeling of having found something you’d keep with yourself is not restricted to movies. I had the same feeling when I read Illusions (Bach). I read it over and over, a strange fascination prodding me to pick it up each time. And if you ask me what the book is all about, I still can’t explain. If you ask me if I’ve read it, my answer would me more “Not very well….” than “Yup. Thrice.”. But, ask me which I consider my favourite movie / book, if I had one, and I’ll more often than not say something like “American Beauty” or “Illusions”. Don’t ask me why. I just like them. In a strange sort of way.
-P.
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Friday, August 30, 2002
From the film Liar Liar
A heart - to - heart talk between a father and his little son-
Son (sticking his tongue out) : "Dad, if I keep making faces, will my face eventually turn out like this?"
Dad (played by Jim Carrey) : "Nope. In fact, some people make quite a good living that way."
-P.
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A note of thanks to Madhu, for having pointed out a few problems in the blog.
-P.
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